Today’s Table Talk is part-2 from last week’s discussion with Dottie Jones, one of Dallas’ sweetest mentors on home management. Get ready for some terrific insight on setting and successfully meeting goals – as a family team.

Thoughts from Dottie Jones
Teamwork and Goals

With “Family Purpose” in mind, you can move on to thinking about “Teamwork and Goals”. Remember, “purpose is why” we do what we do, the goals are what we do to get there. During your next Family Meeting talk about how your family can become a team that wins.

First lets begin by talking about teams in general. Here are some questions you can ask your kids in your family meeting:

1. What are the 2 main parts of a team? (Coaches and players)
2. What is the main goal of a team? ( To win)
3. What are some things that coaches and players do to improve their chances of winning?
4. What are some things that coaches and players sometimes do that contribute to losing?

Asking your kids these questions will help them to take more personal ownership of their contributions to your family team.

Next, discuss what teams must do to WIN…. Teams who win do 2 things. They 1) set goals and 2) practice.

So, together, make a list of goals for your family. Goals can include things like making the bed, cleaning the bathroom. But don’t limit it to tasks … manners, respect of others, kind speech, etc. (we could use a healthy dose of that in our house) are also life skills. Let’s hear some “yes-mam”s on that one!

Next, choose 1 goal to “practice” during the month. Take some time to work at it before you move on to a different task. Studies show it takes 21 days to make a habit, so give it a chance to sink in. Then, add a new goal the next month.

It is critical to recognize that self-esteem is very much grounded in our work. For kids, this includes school, sports, and …. work around the house. Kids who don’t work will compensate by finding competence in other ways (how they look, their popularity, etc.) Make every effort to not do anything for your child that they can do for themselves. They desperately need to work. We were all made to work. Consider the fact that instituting chores is actually a mutually beneficial opportunity. Your home may not sport the shine the housekeeper leaves behind, but the bolster in confidence is well worth a little extra dust.

So … expect mistakes. We are all sinful. Truth be told, we often learn more through the mistakes than we do through the success. Embrace the good and the bad, making sure you build their self esteem, grounding them in who God made them to be.

And … don’t lose sight of your own purpose: to work your way out of a job. There is a day when they will leave your house. Instead of scrambling to teach them the skills they should know before they leave, let them learn it along the way. Then sit back and watch them soar.

{If you ask Dottie Jones what she does, she will tell you that she is first a wife, then a mother, and as time permits an author, speaker and Co-Founder of Life Ministries and Ministering to Moms. Dottie happily shares her wisdom and insight through various classes to mothers on topic ranging from “Building Family Teamwork” to “Managing Meals & Messes”. These are offered at her home. For more information. She can be reached at Life Ministries, 10110 Laingtree Drive, Dallas, Tx 75243, by phone: 972.699.7026}


THANKS so much for sharing with us again, Dottie! If y’all have any questions for Dottie, feel free to post it below in “Comments”. She has provided some great and purposeful food for thought. I personally need to work on letting the kids do the work instead of me doing it for them. It may be a little painful in the short run, but if our bed-thing is any indication, the result will be terrific for everyone!

Thanks for walking the road with me.

A Few Inspiring Teens …
Does your child enjoy literature? Is he or she a creative wordsmith? Ponder this … At age 15, Walter Farley wrote “Black Stallion”. At age 17, Christopher Paolini penned the popular “Eragon”. And, at age 16, S.E. Hinton wrote “Outsiders”, a book often listed as required reading in schools. The sky is the limit with these kids … if they believe in themselves. (- and to think, I’ve let mine get away without making their beds every morning!)

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