A New Arrival

Today is a big day around our house. Well – it’s sort of a big day. It will probably come and just like any other day. Because life goes on. Carpools are run. AP Exams are taken. College decisions are still blurred a bit by indecision. Dinner will likely be take-out. And I will probably forget be somewhere or call someone back or quite possibly pick someone up. All that’s regular around here.

The not-so-regular is what makes today the tiniest bit special. And I want to THANK you guys so much for bearing with me during the process and more than anything for walking the road with me.

I’ve heard folks say that publishing a book is like having a baby – which I guess is true. But in our house, there’s one thing that is VERY different than the majority of births in our home – this addition has a name. (Believe it or not, one can actually leave the hospital with “Name” left blank on a birth certificate! Which we did on multiple occasions.)

Even in the naming of this project, I didn’t have to go it alone. Which has made the process of writing it a true pleasure. This book is not only my story, but your story (which many of you literally shared to be in print.) Thanks to you, none of us has to travel the challenging road of contemplating or taming the issue of comparison alone.

And, I’m excited to officially introduce the latest addition – out and available TODAY.

From the back cover:

Tired of performing? Feeling weighed down by the pressure to be Pinteresting? Does your friend’s wardrobe, body, marriage, paycheck, vacation plans, or photoshoot-worthy home décor leave you wishing your life looked more like that?

You’re not alone.

With its focus on smarter, faster, thinner, and ever-better, our cultural obsession with comparison is undercutting relationships and sapping contentment. Our friends become our audience (or judges), and our titles, activities, even kids become part of our brand. Factor in social media’s constant reminder of what everyone else is doing, and no wonder we feel drained, discontent, and isolated.

Thankfully, we don’t have to live this way!

What I like best is the not alone part. So, thanks for walking this one with me. And for putting up with me. Especially this week as I harass you here and on social media in obligatory promotional efforts. Which I don’t love, but I will happily do because I am as passionate about the topic of comparison as I was (still am) about the topic of entitlement that spurred Cleaning House.

Because, every time we compare ourselves – whether to others, to societal standards, to measuring up, to expectations, to … fill in the blank – our focus is on ourselves and we lose something. With relatively new venues, like social media, comparison seems to be on steroids. It’s hard to escape – not only for us, but for those for whom we care – especially our kids. It touches everyone, and it’s not new.

Which is where together is SO important. I loved that a friend of mine who might have gotten an early copy emailed me this:

Hi Lady! Just a note to tell you that I started reading your new book! I finished Ch2…and love it! So true about comparison stealing my joy. Can’t tell you how many times FACEBOOK has given me that tinge of jealousy…envy..etc etc etc. I typically flip through it in carpool/dentist office/ etc. Yesterday I was about to do it….and decided to move it to it’s own very last page on my apps….and that way I can prepare my brain to be on HIGH ALERT for comparison envy!

I love that. What a practical way to quick-check our mindset before taking a stroll down High-light-reel Lane, a road that tempts us to think that what others have or are doing somehow defines us. It doesn’t. Social media isn’t the issue; our relationship with it is. With my mind in the right place, I can actually have fun catching up with and celebrating friends.

And thus the name. I’m Happy for You. If I can get beyond (Sort of … not really) and actually mean it, my eyes move from me to others – in a healthy way. Which really is the secret sauce of life, something along the lines of the Greatest Commandment (loving others).

Blah-de-blah-blah-blah. Tired of me yet? I’ll stop. But be warned. I might be insufferable this week with a little pulling back the curtain on comparison stuff.

Anyway, I hope you feel inspired to check it out. And should you like it, and feel moved to write a review on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, or Goodreads I sure won’t stop you.

Now the obligatory links (cringe) – The book is available for purchase from any of the following e-retailers or your preferred local bookstore.

(For those in my neck of the woods – Rick & Susan Lewis are just up the street from us at Logos Bookstore in Snider Plaza. I just might have some special treats at the check-out counter for anyone who stops there this week :)

AND – should you feel moved to accompany me down the weird road of book promotion, I’d sure love the company. See below.

Most importantly … THANK YOU! I really mean it. I just can’t imagine, and would never want to, go it alone.

:) Kay

Social Media Share-ables: calling out rather than fueling comparison.

I hope these memes can help us laugh at it all. Here are a few with a couple more to come. Click (might have to download/save) and share (or connect with me) on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest or kaywyma on Instagram and share from there. (Remember, I’m technologically-challenged, too – so I may or may not have a clue about the ease of doing any of those things!)