I remember several years ago, talking with a medical professional about the happiness level of one of our kids. I was concerned. He wasn’t. Holding our 10-pound, almost 12-inch thick file, he gently smiled at me as wisely said “With as many personalities as you have in your home, smiling and laughter might not be the gauge to let you know their happiness level. What makes you happy isn’t necessarily what makes them happy.” I’ve thought about his words often. It’s the same with their giftedness. It’s so easy to assume that our kids will be good at and enjoy the things we do – but it’s highly likely our natural gifting will differ. Same with happiness-drivers. So – when I saw my cyber-friend Jennifer Dukes Lee new book: The Happiness Dare AND her accompanying Happiness Style Assessment
“Mom.” I heard my son’s voice, but didn’t instantly react. “Mom?” he gently asked, “Did you forget to sign me up?” With his name absent on the season finale Champs Swim Meet heat sheet, I didn’t blame him for wondering. I’ve forgotten before. But this time, the omission wasn’t my fault or our coach’s. On another day, this might have fired my ire – the inconvenience, the disappointment and the unfairness of it all. But not today. Life’s events of late – with all their death, heartache, strife, emotions– weighed heavier than a heat sheet omission. Ready to chalk it up to a good life-lesson (sometimes things don’t work out despite our best-laid plans), I reached for my keys to go home. But before I could start to console our way out the door, the meet coordinator swooped in and took care of the oversight.
With May coming to an end and summer shouting a big HELLO :), I thought I’d share a few of my favs from commencement, award ceremonies (I’m not kidding) and EOY carpool contemplation. Sherly Sandberg’s Cal Berkeley Address: Today I will try to tell you what I learned in death. Ms. Sandberg shared for the first time in public what she has learned from the death of her husband last year. She encouraged the young grads that one can thrive in success and in adversity. She included research from psychologist Marty Seligman (from whom we’ve learned a little bit about tackling entitlement via his research on learned helplessness vs. earned success.) “Martin Seligman found that there are three P’s—personalization, pervasiveness, and permanence—that are critical to how we bounce back from hardship.
Hi. My name is Kay. I have definitely been MIA. (And apparently, I”m a poet – this is where I need a laughing-crying emoji. Seriously, I think I could communicate 100% emoji, kind of like hieroglyphics- or not. But that’s another story for another day.) Anywhooo – I just haven’t been moved to write much. Probably because I’ve had so much on my mind. And especially of late because life has been bombarded by some hard stuff in our neck of the woods. My dear friends traveling the cancer road were both hit hard (one even had a heart attack in the midst of everything else!), my sweet and wonderful uncle passed away followed by an unexpected/untimely death of my dear friend’s husband. Moments like these put life into perspective. Then, in the strangest turn of events, I had put together a 2nd Annual