I’ll Take Some of That Lemonade

MakeLemonadeOutOfLemons Today’s Table Talk is by our wonderful friend Kathleen Fischer. She always has something up her sleeve to inspire and direct us as we navigate the often interesting road of parenting tween/teens. She references Dr Seligman who coined the phrase “learned helplessness” – something that we need to recognize and use as motivation every time we stop ourselves form stepping in and doing for our kids. Here’s a brief definition from a 2011 NYT article on teh topic: In observing people’s need for accomplishment, Dr. Seligman says, he’s reminded of his early experiments that famously identified the concept of “learned helplessness.” He found that when animals or people were given a series of arbitrary punishments or rewards, they stopped trying to do anything constructive. “We found that

Table Talk: Time for Pruning at Your House? by Kathleen Fischer

images-9 Today’s Table Talk is from Kathleen Fischer. Head on over to her blog for great stuff on raising tween/teens. She’s been a dear friend of themoatblog since its inception… and has put up me bugging her and encouraged all of us along the way. Here are a few of her thoughts that she posted last week that just might be worth putting into action in your home today. Thanks, Kathleen … and thanks for walking the road with me. When the first week of February rolls around, I always think of my mom, the gardener. She taught me that here in Texas, we should prune our roses on Valentine’s Day.  So this week, I went out to take a look at my roses. I remember them from last summer like the photo above. But the reality is more like the photo below. . . Which got me to thinking about pruning in parenthood. Have you noticed that we 

Kathleen Fischer is “… just ASKING”

Screen shot 2012-12-14 at 11.19.12 AM Today’s post is by our friend and resident teen-expert Kathleen Fischer. I meant to re-post this right after Thanksgiving when she wrote it, but – always better late than never!  Seriously she’s “just asking” … I’m just sayin’. Also, check out the link to Janet Denison’s blog where she is promoting RAKs (Random Acts of Kindness) this weekend with a fun give-away. So beyond the warm-fuzzies that flow whenever we go beyond ourselves, Janet is ready to put her terrific new book in your hands, too. Mostly she hopes that everyone will share, because sharing – more often than not – inspires. Thanks Kathleen for keeping us on our toes, thanks Janet for making serving fun … and thanks to you guys for walking the road with me. -Kay If you’ve heard me speak,

Table Talk: Person-Praise or Process-Praise by Kathleen Fischer

great job Today’s Table Talk is by our wise and sweet friend Kathleen Fischer. Take a peek at Kathleen’s blog for more great stuff to put some wind in your sails – especially for those navigating the teen/tween waters. As always, thanks Kathleen!… and thanks for walking the road with me. -Kay It seemed so SIMPLE. Your kid did well; you gave her a sticker. But have you noticed that by adolescence stickers and such outward signs of success just don’t seem to cut it for your teen anymore? Thanks to the research of Dr. Carol Dweck, noted in the book, Nurture Shock, it’s become clear that how we speak to our children about their successes matters. . . a LOT!  Dweck differentiates between what she calls “person praise” and “process praise.” Person-praise might sound like, “You’re
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